#got to stop this jfc

[immortalsins]

the end of exams has been the biggest goal for me to get to for a couple of months but now it's here i'm realising everything is still awful even if i don't have to study for hours on end

[generichoneydew]

Of all the duos I was expecting to get out of II15, this was certainly not one of them 32/52

[jdorian]

"you don't have to ship x just enjoy—" how about i ship whatever i want without some rando making it into their calling to hand out permission slips? maybe i'll enjoy the source material my way? maybe i find whimsy in shipping certain characters that others only see as platonic? what then? are you gonna steal my pillows?

[graveyarrdshift]

[wrathofrats]

Wrathhhhh, if you feed up to it/inspo strikes may be gets something where RainDrop takes Bug to bed for the first time?

I have fantastic news and 4k of me being weird.

Ao3 link

I got carried away raise your hand if you’re surprised.

4k of jealous dew, brat phantom and mean instigator rain.

It’s slightly toxic and dubious but they’re all having fun and enthusiastically want each other ok but just know it can read a bit dubcon until the middle.

Warnings for a bit of size shaming, degrading, dew acts like he hates phantom but he’s lying, dp, lots of fun weird jealousy, yeah idk what I was doing here

Phantom tried to focus on the plate in his hand. He dunked it back into the water, rolling his eyes in annoyance at the small speck of caked on food that simply wouldn’t come off. The water was a couple degrees too hot, leaving his skin red and uncomfortable. He could hear a mild chatter behind him through the sound of water sloshing and the abrasive sponge on the ceramic. No words to make out, but a more intense conversation at least.

Whatever ghouls' presence that was behind him was coming closer. He could feel the hairs on the back of his neck stand up, a nervous reaction or his sensitive quintessence acting up he never is quite sure, but the air around him starts to smell like salt water and smoke combined with the dish soap that covers his arms.

“Told you phantom would be in here” rain sing songs to a much more unsatisfied dew.

“And I’ll blow you about it later, can you just hurry up?”

Phantom drops the dish back in the sink, a problem for whoever found it next. He shakes the water and suds off his arms before turning to face the two in front of him. Rain seemed happy, a light neutral expression on his face. He tucks a piece of black hair behind his ear as he watches phantoms own body language. Dew however seemed less enthused to see him. His shoulders slump inwards towards rain, arms crossed in front of him. He’s not even looking at phantom, instead staring at his boyfriend like he’s about to drag him away himself.

“Dew and I have a proposition for you” rain starts, giving phantom a once over for any signs he may run. He’s still the anxious new bug they know, eyes full of something akin to fear and intimidation just from rain approaching him. It makes rain feel powerful in an awful way that he knows is greedy.

“Yeah of course” phantom only looks rain in the eyes, not bothering to look over at dew, an action neither of them have missed.

“We think you’re cute bug, we see the way you look at us” rain flicks dews hand as he rolls his eyes at the word cute, “wanted to come ask if you’d possibly like to join us tonight, wanted to know if you’d be our good boy”

“Are you sure?” Phantom asks. Phantom tries to study them. Is it a joke? Are they making fun of him? Rain keeps his friendly expression, dew resigning to stare at the floor instead.

“Very, I think we could have a lot of fun with you if you’d let us”

“Then I want to hear it from him”

Dew nearly growls, his eyes wide at the sentence. The simple but cocky tone having him want to abandon the situation and tell rain he told him so. Knew he was a shit head that didn’t know how to behave correctly.

If dew was being honest with himself he would be more than happy to spoil the little quint with rain if he acted as sweet as he seems. But an ungrateful brat? No one deserved his rain, especially such a greedy thing. It only makes it worse when rain cocks his eyebrows at him expectantly, cueing him to tell phantom what he wants to hear.

He’s more than baffled, even if he shouldn’t be. Rain wanted a challenge, and he was going to get one.

“I want you to join us phantom” dew mumbles.

A bright smile breaks out on phantoms face. Rain beckons him with a finger to follow them back up to his room.

Dew would be lying to himself if he didn’t admit that his enthusiasm was a bit cute. Maybe he just wanted to be sure dew was ok with him joining. Maybe dew was wrong.

Phantom doesn’t hesitate to kneel on the bed once they walk into the room. Surely a known and practiced move, probably how Swiss makes him wait during their usual shenanigans. His hands sit crossed in his lap, his eyes focus only on rain to wait for his next instruction. Dew hopes he can be good, especially if he was this well trained already.

He pads over to card a hand through his hair, tugging at the black and white strands. Phantoms eyes close as he gasps and leans into the pressure on his scalp. He doesn’t try to pull away, even opens his eyes with a look that practically begs dew to pull harder.

“That’s a good boy, you gonna keep being good for us bug?” Dew asks, rubbing at his skin.

Phantom nods in return. His head stays nestled in dews palm, practically purring at the soft touch. It’s nice, much softer than either of them assumed the other would be.

“Oh, see dew? I knew he was a sweet boy.” Rain coos. It’s silent as he walks over to the bed, both ghouls watching for his next move, to tell them what to do. It’s an unconscious reaction in dew to immediately listen to rain, even if he’s supposed to also be in charge here. He knows he’s not, only allowed to have his fun as long as rain approves of it.

Rain stops in front of dew first, pulling him in for a small kiss. Nothing more than a peck on the lips. It’s short and sweet, rains hand lingers on dews neck for another second as he pulls away, staring at the fire ghoul with a loving smile.

He steps in front of phantom next. Another loving touch to the side of his face, something to hopefully calm whatever nerves the new ghoul has. It was supposed to be another chaste peck to the lips but before rain can stop him, phantom has his fists in his shirt, pulling him closer.

The kiss deepens much farther past what rain had intended. Lips slotting together easily as phantom licks into rains mouth. Dew can’t help but watch in horror, he’s sure if phantom was any stronger he would’ve had rain in his lap with the way he’s pulling at him. The wet smacking sound from their lips makes dew ball his fists in the sheets to keep himself from forcefully dragging phantom out of rains grasp. It doesn’t help that phantom fucking groans as rain bites his lips.

Finally rain pulls back after what feels like an hour. A line of spit connects their lips and dew is certain phantom is fucking looking at him for a reaction. A horrible smug look on his face, purely waiting for dew to say or do something about the interaction that just transpired.

“That wasn’t very sweet of you bug, thought you knew better than to take more than you’re allowed” rain lightly chastises him.

“Sorry” phantom whispers, his head turned to dew just to catch his eye before turning back to rain “guess I just got excited”

Rain can’t help but smile. He can’t bring himself to punish phantom yet, especially since he looks apologetic, can’t fault him for wanting to kiss him so badly.

“It’s alright just can’t let you get spoiled now can we?”

Dew stares, baffled. “Are you fucking kidding me?”

“What?” Rain looks at him with a knowing smirk. Practically daring him to do something when they both know he won’t.

“You’re just going to let him get away with that?”

“He doesn’t know any better droplet, stupid thing just got desperate” rain practically purrs, turning back to phantom “didn’t you sweetheart?”

They all know the truth. Dew knows he knows better, rain knows he knows better, and phantom certainty knows, that they both know, that he knows better. But to dew it feels like phantom is truly testing his limits. He wants to see what will get both of them to break.

“And since when do desperate sluts get what they want?” Dew asks, also looking at phantom. Rain still has a hand on his cheek, making phantom nuzzle into his palm innocently.

“I certainly give you what you want dewdrop, even when you act like a jealous bitch. So why is this different?” Rain scolds, not even looking at him. “Dew likes to give me a challenge sometimes stardust, but you wouldn’t do that would you?”

“No sir”

Rain could just beam at the obedience. A pang of pride in his chest at how well phantom listens to him. It’s adorable honestly, how enthusiastic and compliant he is to rains words, not to mention the thick air of jealousy between him and dew. It all goes straight to his ego, only fueling him to be worse.

“You can’t let him think he can get away with shit. Honestly shouldn’t even be allowed to touch you since our play thing has forgotten its place” dew sneers.

“Didn’t think you were in charge here dewdrop” phantom taunts back.

“Excuse me? I have mo-“

“He’s right, you’re not in charge here darling and you know that” rain cuts dew off before he can finish his sentence. “Are you just jealous? Upset that phantom is getting more attention than you? Do you not trust me to take care of my angelfish?”

Rains tone is sickly sweet, daunting like the call of a siren. It has dew immediately quiet, listening to rains words as if his life depended on it. A part of the jealousy fades out of him, grateful for the way rain smiles when he looks at him.

“I do, just-“ dew attempts to stammer out an excuse.

“None of that then. Show phantom how sweet you can be to me”

Dew is on rain immediately. He easily rips his shirt off of him, discarding it next to the bed. His hands run down his lithe torso, hot kisses trailing behind them. Praising any inch of skin that rain will allow him to.

He runs his hands slowly down to rains sweatpants, giving a small look over to phantom who seems more flustered than he should be given the proposition. The quint can’t decide where to look, doesn’t want to look either ghoul in the eyes, doesn’t want to stare directly at rains tits, he settles for shifting his gaze wherever he can. From dews hands that grip rains waistband, to the floor, to rain looking down on dew hungrily, his arms now crossed in front of him, pushing his chest together. The slightest bit of cleavage that forms makes him want to drool.

“Want you to watch phantom, eyes over here starlight” rain whispers. Phantom swallows thickly, allowing his eyes to settle on dews hands.

Dew finally pulls at rains sweats, slowly revealing him to phantom. It’s a teasing pace, both ghouls watching to see his reaction. See how worked up they can get him without actually touching him.

The band finally stretches past the swell of his ass, loosening around his thighs, enough to drop to the floor. Rains skin is perfect, hairless, smooth, phantom thinks he may be drooling as he watches dew thumb over his hips with a possessive look on his face.

Phantoms breath hitches as rain bends over in front of him to kick off his pants completely. Still slow and teasing, as if he’s showing himself off. Rains completely exposed in this position, plump little ass practically in phantoms face, his cunt fully on display for phantom to gawk at. His folds are already slick and shiny with arousal. Phantom would do anything to taste him.

“Like what you see phantom?” Rain asks, standing back up to face him. He stands over him, looking down while phantom continues to stare at his chest.

“Fuck- “ phantom chokes “you’re so pretty”

“That all starlight?”

“Please rainy, let me worship you, let me play with your tits” phantom begs

And oh, that goes straight to rains head. The glassy eyed thing staring at him like he’s a marble statue, carved by the delicate hand of a master. It’s awful, he considers letting phantom touch him as he pleases until dew has his hands on his waist, pulling him back with a snarl.

“Absolutely not. Hands off”

“Dew” rain warns.

“You haven’t been good enough to touch him” dew growls again, staring phantom directly in the eye with a look that would be threatening to him if it was anyone besides dewdrop.

“And you’re still not in charge.” Rain scolds, tearing himself from dews grip. “Don’t be selfish, I gave you your attention. Didnt think it would make you so spoiled”

“But rainy” dew protests.

“Honestly I don’t think either of you have been good enough to touch me”

Dew and phantom look at each other in shock as rain moves to sit in the chair across from the bed. Thighs hiked up on the arm rests in a lazy position giving a perfect view of his cunt to the other two ghouls. He moves his hands down his thighs slowly as if he’s teasing himself, a wicked smile on his face.

“Think you two should make up, put on a show for me” rain rubs up between his folds, barely brushing his clit that is on display. He bites his lip at the electric shock that courses through his body from the small touch, a gasp on his lips.

“You don’t mean what I think you mean”

“You know I do. Make up with him and then if you do well enough you two can share me”

Phantom and dew stare at each other for a second in some kind of pseudo dominance contest. A silent argument of who will submit to the other, admit what is in their eyes, defeat.

“Gonna let me fuck you baby boy?” Dew asked, low and gravely as he crawls over to phantom who looks like he’s about to claw him if he lays a hand on him, “put on a good show for rainy? Sure you make such pretty sounds when you’re actually behaving”

“And who said I have to be the one whimpering like a whore? You seem to need to be rains bitch all the time, I might as well make you mine too”

Phantom sits up to face dew too, a mischievous look in his eyes. Another silent argument to see who backs down first without actually laying hands on each other. Dew wants a fight, more than happy with physical force, but the satisfaction of phantom possibly asking dew to fuck him is enough to keep him still in their stand off.

“You’d look so pretty though stuffed with my cock. I know you can be such an obedient little thing, maybe I just need to get you all stupid and cock drunk so you’ll be good” dew closes in, his face only inches from phantoms. Phantom can feel his hot breath on his neck, lips practically touching the sensitive skin. He doesn’t want to give up, doesn’t want to give dew the pleasure of knowing he’s won.

It’s hard to think. Between being able to smell rains own arousal, seeing him slowly play with himself at the sight of the two on the bed, and dew who is practically closing in on him. He would be lying to himself if he didn’t admit that dews harsh words and degrading tone weren’t getting to him.

“Just say yes bug, tell me how much you want me”

Dew grabs phantoms chin in his hand, looking down at him from hooded lids. There’s a dizzying feeling in his head from the way dews other hands roams his body. Pets over his hip, plays with the waistband of his pants asking to get rid of them. He wants it. He wants dews hands on him, wants him to shame him for giving up so easily. Doesn’t care if dew gets cocky about it, just wants to be touched finally.

“Please, do something just touch me, need you” phantom starts to babble. His hands fly to dews to help in tearing off his own clothes. He tugs at his pants with dew before ripping his shirt over his head. There’s no time to process his state of exposure before he’s throwing himself onto dew.

“God if I knew you’d be this easy I would’ve bent you over a long time ago” dew laughs.

“Shut up, just do something, anything” phantom growls. He roughly tugs at dews own clothing as dew simply lays back and lets him. He has a cocky aura to him, a smugness about letting phantom act desperate after his stunts earlier.

“Gotta stop groping me like a slut and then maybe I’ll fuck you like one”

Phantoms off him in an instant. He lays back against the headboard, thighs open as his cock sits red and angry on his belly. Dew can see everything in this position, phantom completely on display for him. The way his cock fucking leaks from being hard for what seems like hours now, his little hole that is basically begging for dews cock in it, he looks more obscene than dew would like to admit.

“Stop fucking teasing then and prove it” phantom groans while dew and rain just watch him. Rain still sits on his throne like he’s waiting to be impressed. A slow slick sound comes from his fingers as he continues to lazily stroke his cunt.

It’s a challenge, something to provoke dew into being rougher with him and they both know it. Phantoms dragged down the bed in a second, knees pushed up against his chest.

“Shouldn’t have to prove anything to you when you’re already whining for it. You’ll fucking take anyone as long as it gets your little dick off won’t you?” Dew spits sloppily into his hand, smearing the saliva around phantoms hole. It’s barely enough glide for two fingers as dew shoves them in haphazardly. Phantom scrunches his face at the burn, a small whimper coming out of his mouth.

“Yeah? Is that all you needed?”

“Just fuck me already please-“ phantom squeaks as dew leans down to tease at his cock. He mouths over it, cleans the pool of pre that gathered on his stomach. He can feel it twitch over his lips and if dew thought he had any more time he would be more than happy to continue to savor his taste.

“Gotta get you stretched out. Don’t want to hurt you” dew coos, scissoring his fingers to open phantom up.

“Make it hurt fuck- dew please make it hurt” phantom cries as dew kitten licks at the tip again.

Dew can’t help but let out a shaky curse at the quints begging. He tears his fingers out to spit again in an attempt to lube himself up enough for phantom, even despite the pleas for it to hurt. Dew thinks he may black out. Getting phantom underneath him is satisfying enough, but for him to beg him to hurt him? Let him make a mess of him in front of rain? Dew truly doesn’t know how he can control himself.

“Yeah, I got you baby boy don’t worry” dew reassures him. He’s cute, even despite his awful mouth.

They both groan in unison once dew finally pushes into him. He’s slow, watching phantom for any signs of actual discomfort, but phantom looks like he’s about to cry if he doesn’t cum soon. He arches off the bed, hands fisted in the sheets below him. There’s a pretty flush down his chest as he pants trying to adjust.

“Please move please dew you gotta move come on” phantom cries.

“I’ll make such a mess of you, promise I’ll take care of you”

Rain still watches in amusement. Seeing his dew fuck the brat out of the sweet ghoul below him is more than entertaining. It’s beyond arousing to see him so commanding, watching as he completely takes phantom apart on his cock. He fingers himself open watching the two desperately fuck each other. Slick leaks from the three fingers stuffed inside of him and onto the chair, hot and messy. He can’t help himself, can’t help the little grunts and whines he makes as he watches dew fuck phantom hard and fast into the mattress.

He can tell they’re both close, the insults and degrading words fizzled out into curses and moans that have rain trying to not bring himself to edge too just watching them.

“Stop, off of each other” rain calls out retracting his own soaked fingers from himself.

Phantom nearly sobs as dew does what he’s told and pulls out. He scrambles to grab at him to keep inside to no avail.

“No rain please I need it” phantom begs

“If you stay quiet I’ll let you both cum in me, give you a little treat for being good yeah?” Rain pets over phantoms hair, laughing a bit at the tears in his eyes before laying next to them.

“Didn’t think you two should be allowed to have all the fun. Especially since you’ve been whiny brats this entire time”

Rain beckons dew over with a finger, silently telling him what he wants. He’s already loose and slippery from playing with him, doesn’t take any effort for dew to slip right inside of him. He’s hot and wet and so fucking pretty that dew doesn’t know if he will be able to last.

“You too bug, come here” rains calls

“I- will I fit?”

“Baby I think aethers thicker than the two of you combined, more worried if you’ll even get me off like this”

It’s mean, degrading, rains harsh tone and uninterested expression making dew and phantom both desperate to please him. They can barely comprehend their own thoughts, long since close to their own edges. Phantom isn’t sure he will last either just being in rain, let alone with dew pressed tightly next to him.

It’s almost too much. Phantom barely fits despite rain chastising them for not being enough. It’s slick enough that he pops right in with a sick wet sound, making all 3 curse with each other.

“Can’t move rainy, too much” phantom cries. His limbs shake, thighs trying to keep from bucking into him even though he knows he will cum almost immediately.

“I know, let me cum around you two and I promise I’ll give you whatever you want” rain pants as he reaches down to circle his own clit. He’s sensitive, borderline painfully so. Can’t help but clench down every time he touches himself even though he’s stuffed to the brim.

It doesn’t help dew and phantoms situation, even just his tight cunt clenching around them has them both teetering on the edge of their own orgasms.

“Too close raincloud, it’s too much I won’t last please-“ dew calls out, vision blurry as rains continues to leak around them

“Cum for me then, fill me up” rain gasps. His fingers twitch as he gets closer.

It doesn’t take much, phantom and dew both painfully hard and sensitive, just a couple more strokes is all they need before they are both filling rain beyond his limit. It’s hot, too much as rain also cums around them, feeling his own slick gush out of him.

He’s gross, a complete mess as dew and phantom pull out to gawk at the sight in front of them. Rain is fucking gaping, cum and his own arousal leaking out of him. It’s obscene how ruined he looks, pussy swollen and abused.

“You ok raincloud?” Dew asked, slightly concerned as they all come down from their highs.

“M fine angelfish” rain pants. He’s flushed and tired, panting from exhaustion and how sore he’s starting to feel. “Proud of both of you, happy I finally got you to get along”

“Dew started it” phantom finally speaks up.

“Fuck you bug” dew laughs

[shutupineedtothink]

More Moiraine & Lan (and the Bond) thoughts, because I really just can’t help myself.

Just thinking about how we know every Aes Sedai and Warder share the Bond, but we don’t see any other AS/Warder teams using it as a form of communication NEARLY as much as Moiraine and Lan do.

Like these mofos are having full conversations with head tilts and tiny eyebrow raises and 3 seconds of eye contact from the jump. Sometimes not even looking at each other. And it’s extra great if you’re a show only like me because you only realize it when you go back later after all the stuff with the Bond is explained in 1x04/1x05. Like I remember thinking when I was first watching the pilot ‘wow, these two are really in sync, clearly they’ve known each other a long time,’ but it’s so much more than that obviously.

Now, one easy explanation for this is that we’re just seeing them the most, they’re main characters, and s1 especially does a lot of work hyping up the Bond and how important it is so that we get the full impact of them being cut off later. Makes sense.

But… idk like even Alanna and Ihvon and Maksim, who are actually in a romantic relationship, don’t seem to prefer the Bond as a way to communicate. We even see them have their little diplomatic discussion before Ihvon goes to follow Tomas. It’s an actual conversation. Maksim even prefers the Bond masked, so I guess in that way they kind of have to talk to each other.

Verin and Tomas are pretty quiet in general, but still it’s not emphasized that they use the Bond to communicate that much. Perhaps this is also highlighted by Tomas’s advice to Lan that the Bond isn’t the only common language they share with their Aes Sedai.

Except for Moiraine and Lan, it’s like AT LEAST 80%. It’s the primary way they communicate. Because 1. they’re both so naturally reserved on the outside (but feel very deeply on the inside), and 2. I imagine it comes in handy to be extra good at it when you’re on the road searching for the Dragon Reborn and you don’t want everyone around you to know what you’re about.

Then there’s Stepin’s comment from s1 to Kerene, “Can you imagine their dinners?” Which is funny but also very telling. To all the other Aes Sedai and Warders, Moiraine and Lan seem pretty cold and distant, to everyone else and each other. But again, that’s by design to protect their mission. They’re just having conversations no one else can see, even other Bonded pairs. It’s like most AS and their Warders use the Bond as insurance, a fail safe even, to understand and communicate with each other, with normal human communication (i.e. TALKING) as the primary method. But for Moiraine and Lan it’s the other way around.

My POINT BEING, that this adds weight to their storyline in S2. Like they are REALLY struggling because on top of everything else, this fundamental piece of their relationship and communication is just gone. And it opens a door for Moiraine to push Lan away, when she NEVER would have been able to before, practically or emotionally. And he reels from her attacks because he’s just not as good at understanding her without the Bond, when he would have seen right through that shit before, just from feeling alone. So Tomas can say to him, you need to really listen, but 20 years of shared emotional mind reading is not that easy to bypass. You don’t learn normal person communication skills overnight. Certainly not when there’s this gaping hole in your head/heart where another person you probably knew better than yourself should be but isn’t.

Anyway, I think it just adds even more credence to why they’re both so lost throughout most of S2, especially Lan. And what makes them so badass with the Bond but so absolutely uncoordinated without it. And why every other Aes Sedai/Warder thinks they’re fuckin weird. And why we love them, because who doesn’t want to be so fundamentally understood like that? Who doesn’t want their own secret language with someone that no one else really gets, but that person gets you on a level so real it can’t be replaced? That’s what we’re all reaching for, and that’s what they have with each other. For better or worse.

[lonely-night]

the lady who played on the diplomat EXCUSE ME THATS ALLISON JANNEY

[kindahoping4forever]

Clips of Ashton performing Breakup live @ The Belasco - 18 July 2024

[luna-the-cretar]

Motherfucker, I’m trying to go to bed bc it’s 3am and I have work in like 10hrs, and my brain is over here going into panic mode and convinced that I’m gonna die bc tooth hurts

Am I gonna die bc of a toothache? Probably not. Is my brain convinced otherwise, causing my heart rate to rise? Absolutely. Is it annoying? Very.

[cluescorner]

Long Post about Savage Opress because I am Normal

Savage Opress, you are everything.

You are at your strongest when you are fighting to protect the people you love. You had to participate in a battle royale and subjected yourself to a fate worse than death in order to protect your brother. You were forced to kill the brother you fought so hard to protect, your last words to him as he begged for his life were 'You make (me) weak'.

You are Frankenstein's monster, a kinslayer. You just have to live with that. Your mistress isn't giving you a choice in the matter.

You were placed under the control of a cruel master/mistress twice in the span of like a week. You were forced to betray your master and (under your mistress's orders) you killed two jedi, making you an enemy of the two most powerful entities in the galaxy. You made these enemies against your own will. You were lightning spammed and abused to the point that you were able to break free of your mistress's control.

You are then attacked by these two random jedi you have never met. They seem intent on bringing you in. They stand besides each other and fight to protect each other. You are reminded of how you did the same for your own brother. You killed that brother.

You run to the only home you've ever known, the same home that treated you as lesser-than and transformed you into what you are now. Your home is destroyed, all of your sisters are dead. You are upset by this. They were the cause of your suffering, but they were still kin.

You are told that you have a remaining brother, one who can make you strong enough to protect yourself. You decide to travel across the galaxy to find him. You killed your last brother, you will do anything for this one.

You seem to create trouble everywhere you are now. You are now incapable of solving problems without violence, so violence is what you become. You become hatred. You had love once, but everything that you loved is dead. Except for your remaining brother. You do whatever you must to find him.

You find your brother. Your brother is delirious and half-dead, but he is your brother and you found him. You can fix this. Your brother sees you too, or at least he sometimes does. You are a reflection of him, of what he was meant to be. You are strong and powerful. Your brother is not anymore, but he will be soon.

Your mother, the same woman who took you and warped you into a monster (that is what everybody calls you now), fixes your brother. Your brother grabs your face and twists it, painfully examining your every pore. You don't begrudge him this. You have done the same to it. Your face isn't yours, but it is the only face you have.

Your brother screams for vengeance against Kenobi, he must have revenge. You must stand by your brother, he is all that is left. You embark on a quest of vengeance against a man you only briefly met.

You become everything your brother needs you to be. You are his protector, his sword, his second-in-command. You have love again and you will do anything to keep it this time.

Your brother is a terrible person. Your brother will massacre a village for the sake of getting Kenobi's attention. Your living brother is nothing like the one you killed. You aren't sure this is a good thing.

Your brother lures Kenobi to the village and you both capture him. Your mistress shows up and immediately sets about belittling you. You are the monster she and your mother created. You are not her thrall anymore, you can fight her now. You do exactly that.

Your mistress and Kenobi retreat, your brother chooses to bide his time. You will wait with him.

Your brother and you infiltrate a ship, finding a fortune of credits. You are happy with this, you have never seen this much money in your life. Your brother's only fortune is the downfall of Kenobi.

Your brother calls you apprentice, decides that is what your relationship is now. You don't see the need for dominance, you are brothers after all. Your brother disagrees and you will subject yourself to this for your brother's sake. You are a reflection of him, of all his past flaws. You are devoted to those you love and able to feel things other than vindictive glee or hatred. Your brother is not anymore, he might never be again.

You think your brother is incapable of love. You love him all the same.

You and your brother next run into Kenobi with another Jedi Master. You do not know her name nor anything about her. You kill her, goring her with your (far larger than they should be) horns and running her through with your lightsaber. Your master is not forcing your hand this time, you can finally choose to make an enemy of the Jedi. You would have been their enemy either way, but the false choice is comforting regardless.

You and your brother corner Kenobi. You think for a moment that you have gotten the upper-hand, then Kenobi cuts your arm off. Your body leaks green magic. Your mother's magic still holds power over you even after everything. You wish it didn't.

Your brother shoves Kenobi away from you and decides to retreat. You aren't sure if this is a sign of affection towards you or if this is a strategic move. Your brother speaks as if it's the latter. You see no reason to believe otherwise.

You manage to escape, but are left adrift in space. You are freezing and slowly running out of oxygen. Your home was warm and full of breatheable air. You are alone with only a brother who calls you 'apprentice' for company. Your home was filled with brothers who called you by your name or by 'brother'. You are alive. Your home and brothers are dead.

You next wake up in an unfamiliar place. You smash all the equipment around you. You are now incapable of solving problems without violence, so violence is what you have become. Your brother informs you that his plans have changed, and now you two will be working with Deathwatch. You have no idea what Deathwatch is or who your brother just made a deal with. You will follow him regardless.

You stand up and hit your head on the lamp above you. You were supposed to be shorter than you are now. Your body is wrong. You look in the mirror and you are not yourself. Your body isn't yours, but it is the only body you have.

Your brother takes over Mandalore. You watch as your brother marches Kenobi into the throne room and prepares to execute the Duchess of this planet.

Kenobi offers sympathy. Kenobi recognizes that your brother never had a choice in joining the dark side. Kenobi had gone to your village and seen what it is like for the nightbrothers. Kenobi, despite everything, is trying to be kind.

You hear your story in Kenobi's words. You never had a choice in any of this. You never stood a chance. Your body isn't yours, your mind has been warped and twisted into serving the goals of another. You only wanted to protect your brother.

Your brother kills the love of Kenobi's life. Your brother has stripped himself and you of any possible chance to take the olive branch Kenobi was extending. You ask if you should kill Kenobi now. You know that stewing in grief and guilt can be a terrible fate. Your brother decides to keep him imprisoned. Your brother is counting on the Kenobi stewing in his grief and guilt. Your brother wants to drag out his suffering for as long as possible.

Your brother is in charge for less than a rotation. Your brother panics and bows before a withered old man, calling him 'master'. Your brother lies and fawns to his master. Your brother's master does not care.

You have never met this man before. You have no reason to fight him. Your brother is terrified of him. Your brother grovels before nobody, but he bows before this man. You don't have to do this.

Your brother needs you. You draw your weapon.

You manage to get a hit in on your brother's master. You are one of very few in the galaxy who can say that. You are at your strongest when you are fighting to protect the people you love.

You are stabbed in both your hearts. Your efforts to protect your brother, your pain and suffering, your love and affection, you, Savage Opress, you don't matter. You didn't know it, but you were fighting the most powerful being in the galaxy.

You never had a choice. You never stood a chance.

You die thinking you were unworthy of your brother. Your brother never said or did anything to make you think otherwise. You die calling yourself apprentice, that is the relationship your brother wanted. Your brother holds your hand as you die, it is trembling. You aren't sure if it is from grief or hatred. You decide it must be the latter. Your brother is only capable of hatred.

You knew your brother was incapable of love. You loved him all the same.

You don't know that you might have been the only thing your brother cared about besides his vengeance. You don't know that when you are unconcious he calls you by your name, he calls you brother. You don't know that he nearly killed the Death Watch soldiers, but stopped when they threatened you. You couldn't know. Your brother never told you.

You don't know that he uses his grief as fuel for his duel with Sidious. You don't know that he switches his ire away from Kenobi and decides that his former master is a more pressing target of his hatred You don't know that he spends the rest of his days trying to find a new apprentice to fill the hole you left and that it never works. You will never know. You are dead.

You died realizing you were nothing like your brother. You never were. Your body shrinks down, you finally look like yourself again. You can't be happy about this. You can't take relief in the fact that all the magic which ruined your life has been dispelled. You can't feel anything. You are dead.

You are right. You are nothing like Darth Maul. Your brother is motivated by hatred, you are motivated by love. Your brother will die having found peace, you died having found nothing but pain and grief and yet more pain.

You are my favorite magical girl and you have suffered so much more than Jesus.

[pennedinblood]

as of ten minutes ago we are officially Jobless™️. my sign to retire early and devote the remainder of my existence to writing toxic old man yaoi

[passerinesoncaffeine]

I AM SLOWLY LOSING MY FUCKING MIND.

I AM SO VERY NORMAL ABOUT THIS GAME.

[shinesurge]

at this point anytime i find good queer media i am instinctively bracing for the fandom to villainize the queer creators for writing queer stories more complex than a disney film because it's a When not an If

like everybody is constantly going on about how media is their Safe Space and they're trying to use it to process trauma and shit and that's why they're justified in lashing out at creators for writing Upsetting Stories but FOR SOME REASON nobody considers that the writers are ALSO fucked up queer people using media to process their own grief. the stories were theirs first??? we have GOT to get better at applying critical thought to who made something and why instead of just doing cinemasins trope spotting and calling it media analysis then using it to act like queer storytellers only write things to hurt the audience holy shit

[marxm-03]

Morally ambiguous characters when the "good" guys make bad choices and fuck things up AGAIN

[twistedappletree]

broooooooooo

[criminal-sen]

btw i love how tumblr only asks if you want to add tags some of the time. I like to think some of my text posts are so regrettable, the system that implements it is like 😬 we'd better hold off this time, lads. Let 'er sink.. it's for their own good😬

yes they're sailors. and they're also gay and kissing with tongue